P7 - Week 4 - The Game of the Century (again)

It’s that time of week again. The time when you see that I have posted a new blog, have nothing better to do, and decide to click a link and do some reading…only to be disappointed when you find that it’s merely football picks. I’ll try to make it entertaining and informative. And I don’t mean football informative. Maybe I can teach you something you didn’t know. We’ll see how it goes…

So far I’ve picked 31 games and I’ve been right 19 times. That’s not terrible. Let’s see how this week goes.

UAB @ Tennessee (-13.5) – In a few short years UAB has gone from a burgeoning program to completely irrelevant. In that same time frame UT has gone from a perennial powerhouse to mostly irrelevant. This game is likely to be a stinker. I expect the Blazers to put up a good fight. I expect Vol fans to be at least slightly nervous in the 2^nd and 3^rd quarters. In the end Tennessee wins it, but I think UAB has just enough talent to keep it close to 10 points. UAB.

Florida @ Kentucky (+14) – Apparently Vegas has not watched any SEC football this fall. Florida’s offense is terrible. Kentucky lights up the scoreboard like MIT grads light up the blackjack tables. I expect Florida to score more points than their average. I expect the Wildcats to score less than their average. I think the Gators will win, but I don’t see any way they can win by 14 points. Kentucky.

Fresno State @ Ole Miss (-2.5) – Houston Nutt’s Rebels are a 2-½ point favorite at home. Given the typical 3-point home-field edge, that means Vegas sees Fresno’s Bulldogs as a ½ point better than the Fighting Ackbars. That is embarrassing, even for someone named Nutt. One thing is certain; points will be scored. In the end I expect the Rebels to score more points than the well-travelled Bulldogs. Ole Miss.

West Virginia @ LSU (-9.5) – The Swamp-Rats vs. The Hill People. I’d like to see the over-under for “average number of teeth per fan” for this game. I have very little to say about this game. I’ll let you make up your own jokes from here on out. Just be more specific than “redneck” when talking about one fan base or the other. Football wise, I don’t think the Mountaineers can hang with LSU in terms of talent. I expect they’ll put up a gallant fight for 2 ½ quarters, but then the Bayou Bengals will take over. (This is, of course, assuming that Les Miles’ typical late game blunder is only bone-headed, as opposed to catastrophic). LSU

Georgia @ Mississippi State (-0) – It’s a pick ‘em. In this week’s fight against irrelevance, the Bulldogs take on the Bulldogs. This should be a hard-fought game. If you watch on TV (is it even on TV?) expect to hear the oft-used phrase “well-coached team” more often than either team scores. I expect Georgia has a little more pride than their canine counterparts from Starkville. I expect UGA to eek out a victory. Georgia.

Alabama @ Arkansas (+7) – Here we have this week’s “Game of the Century.” There will, of course, be a different “Game of the Century” next week, and the week after, and the week after. This week #1 Alabama visits #10 Arkansas. I expect one of two outcomes. Either the game lives up to the hype heaped upon it, or Bama blows the Hogs out of the water. I’m leaning toward the 1^st option. Here’s the problem: so far, I’m 0-2 when I pick against Bama. But I feel like I should pick against Bama. Initially I did pick against them. Something tells me to go the other way. When in doubt, go with the mullet. So I will. Bama.

South Carolina @ Auburn (-3) – Steve Spurrier brings his Gamecocks to the plains for Auburn’s second game in a row against a team from South Carolina. Even if you know nothing about football, I’ll give you a quick and easy method to gauging this game. Watch the visor. The more the visor is on the ground, the better the chance for an Auburn victory. Last week it took the Tigers 30 minutes to wake up and play football. This week I expect the offense to come out hot and stay that way. Auburn’s best chance is to keep the Cocks in 3^rd and long situations. So far, AU’s run defense has been passable, which gives them a good shot. I’ve picked Auburn 3 times. So far I’m 2-1. This week I’ll play the odds. Auburn.

There you have it. Week 4’s football prognostications. Are you not entertained???