189. No progress, but, hey, it was a weekend!
I went home for lunch today. I ate leftovers and did my best to free up some space on my TiVo.
As I partook of food and TV programs from last week my mind began to wander. Soon I had ceased paying attention to either my food or Tina Fey. My mind was busy pondering one of the great philosophical questions of our time.
What would I do for a Klondike Bar? Would I…
- Go hunting duck with Dick Cheney?
- Swap places with Alec Baldwin’s daughter for a week?
- Watch a Paulie Shore movie? (Except for Encino Man. That is an awesome flick!)
- Enjoy a night on the town with Andy Dick?
- Stand in Times Square wearing only a pair of briefs, boots, a cowboy hat, and a guitar?
- Walk the streets of Detroit after dark?
- Invest in Gigli 2?
- Click on a link in an email with the subject – “Bambi wants to say hi!”?
- Go for a drive with Ted Kennedy? (I realize he is very ill, but it’s still funny.)
- Sit through Mamma Mia! again?
Then I realized the answer to all of these things is – No, I would not. In fact a Klondike Bar is not exactly something special. It’s ice cream with chocolate around it. Vanilla ice cream! And there’s not even a stick. So by the time I eat two bites the bottom half of the chocolate shell will be either all over my hand or a dark gelatinous glop surrounded by aluminum foil.
Now that I really think about it, I’m pretty sure there is absolutely nothing that I would do for a Klondike Bar.
A Fudgesicle, though, I may shed clothes for one of those things.
Scott. You are on Friendship Probation.
ReplyDeleteHow do you deny respect to the Klondike Bar? It is without a doubt the KING of all Ice Cream treats. Its magic is its simplicity. Like the Mario Kart, or Tetris, you dont' try to improve on Incredible. it always comes up short.
I'm begging you to reconsider your position.
Tonight you cut me. Cut me real deep....
Oh, but there IS a marvel of sweetness even more wonderful - so magnificent that you may be willing to stand disrobed in Times Square, without even your undies or guitar. This wonder of the universe is known as the Magnum. It comes in the ice-cream-on-a-stick format, but is unlike anything you have tasted before. The vanilla (yes) in the middle is really quite wonderful, but that's not what you came here for. Surrounding the mighty fine ice cream is the thickest layer of chocolate you've ever seen on any confection! And not just any cheap chocolate - this is the good stuff! There are several varieties to ponder as you stare through the frosty glass-topped box at the gas station: milk chocolate (like you've never had before), choc w/almonds, choc & caramel (not my kind of thing), and my absolute favorite, the Dark. Chocolate. Magnum. Whoa! It's worth going out of your way for one of these babies. It's worth going all the way back to Israel! ...which is part of the reason we are organizing a group to go this February, for a Magnum.
ReplyDeleteBy the way, anybody want to go with us to Israel in February? We've got one of the formost biblical archeologists for our guide, Brian Kvasnica. I never thought I'd really want to go. But having gone w/Brian, I'm eager to take as many folks as I can. It's a really cool place to go. Plus, they've got Magnums!
Here for Magnum website:
http://www.loveicecream.com/uk_en/products/magnum/default.aspx