On March 18, 2005 Misty and I celebrated our 10th anniversary. During the week leading up to that date I posted daily stories about our ten years of marriage. Today’s edition of the “Rest of…” is one of those entries.
March 15th, 2005
In honor of our 10th Anniversary, I'll tell Scott & Misty Stories all week. (Well, the rest of the week.) Today, it's "How we met!"
I'll start in 7th grade. It was our Spring Fling Dance. A girl comes up and asks me if I'll ask her friend to dance. I say, "I don't dance!" She says please, so I said I would ask her. Turns out the girl was Misty Rawdon. Wow, she's cute. I never asked her. I'm shy like that.
Fast forward to the end of 8th grade. The National Junior Honor Society took a field trip to Opryland (remember Opryland?). After our glorious day of roller coasters and expensive food we boarded the bus to head back to Florence. Somewhere in Columbia, TN I made the following comment about a pick-up truck I was admiring. "That is a bad ass truck!" As soon as I said it, I got a jolting kick to the back of my seat. I look back and Misty Rawdon is there and says, "You shouldn't say that." Me: "Say what? Ass?" Misty: "No, truck." (Weren't we cute?)
Long story short, I ended up sitting with her for a good part of the ride home because our seat mates wanted to have seats to themselves to sleep. It was a wonderful bus ride. That is until Jamie Cain decided, for some unknown reason, to poke Allison Sneed in the butt with a spork. I asked him why and he echoed Sir Edmund Hillary: "Because it was there."
Back at the school Misty and I we two of the last to be picked up. We sat on a fence and laughed about trucks and bus seats and sporks and butts. Then her mom came to pick her up. I remember that car being one of the most horrible things I'd ever seen. It meant she was leaving. I sat there on the fence alone, a little sad, but mostly I was excited about the day I'd just experienced.
OK, I’ll include one more. 2005 was an eventful year. In July (or was it August?) we left the church I grew up in. Here’s why:
August 15th, 2005
I've been avoiding posting this. I don't think it's going to be any big surprise, but I said I would. Why, after 31 years give or take for time away, are we leaving St. James?
Before I start, let me say that I have thought a lot about why we're leaving, and I have thought a lot about posting it on here. Some of you are going to completely disagree with me. Some of you could care less and probably won't read further than the next few sentences. Some of you already know and have read my rants in e-mail. For those select few who want to know here it is:
Read on if you dare.
A few weeks ago, this shows up in our weekly newsletter:
It was the last straw. I sent an e-mail to the guy listed. I told him he did the right thing.
Misty and I have not been very comfortable at St. James since we moved back. We were put through the wringer pretty hard when I was working there and it's been hard to forget. Granted, it was a select few raising a ruckuss (and most are gone now), but it was still not a pleasant time and the feathers haven't quite un-ruffled. And since we've been back we just haven't felt welcome. It may be us being picky, but we have felt very much like outsiders. The pastor has rubbed me the wrong way from the beginning, and trust me, I tried hard to like him. His idea of who we are and what we should do as followers of Christ and mine clash.
I think what pissed me off most was the "I feel this way, so you should, too" attitude in the article. They automatically assume that I have "concern and disapproval" to share. In other words, "A good christian should be concerned and disapprove of this decision." That pisses me off! One of the great things about the Methodist church is it's acceptance of difference of opinion. We can all believe relatively different things and still be respectful of each other and realize we may both be right. There is gray area. I like gray. I don't like black & white. God is not black & white. There's a lot of theological gray.
Granted the fact that we were being asked, in essence, to persecute a specific group of people didn't make me very happy either. I have no problem with homosexuality. I did, for a long time. But the more I've lived, the more life experience I've gained the more I've realized that we're all created by the same God and he loves us all the same. My mind started to change, then it became personal. I found out someone I've respected and loved as a person and as a Christian is gay. Using the good ol' Wesleyan Quadrilatteral (Scripture, Tradition, Experience, and Reasoning) leads me to the conclusion that God loves gay people! I don't believe you choose to be gay. I believe you are created that way. I don't believe God would create us unable to avoid sin. Therefore I don't believe homosexuality is a sin.
After I read the above article in our newsletter, I went to the church website and there was a flaching graphic, "Open Hearts, Open Minds, Open Doors." It made me want to cry. How could we be so hypocritical? Well that logo is gone now. Replaced by a flashing logo of "Conservative in Doctrine, Evangelical in ... blah, blah, blah."
I ran into this same thing in Paducah around the time of General Conference. Our church voted in an Administrative Council meeting to send a letter supporting the Discipline's teaching on homosexuality in reference to a case of some openly homosexual pastor. (It may have been the Stroud case.) I chickened out and did not vote "no" (I was on staff and we sort of needed the income so i didn't want to stir the pot.) I just didn't vote at all. The next day I went to talk to our pastor about my objections to the letter. He was amazing. We talked for a long time and he made me feel much better about him and the church. He admitted that he was almost of teh same opinion as me, he just needed a little more evidence. He told me that there were a few gay people in the church, some in "high places." With St.J, I know I would not get that.
The bottom line is, we don't have to all believe the exact same way. I like the way Youth Specialties puts it.
"We believe in Jesus. We believe in the Church. We believe in the scandalous grace of God. We believe in the Bible. That’s kind of it. The 'biggies.' We know there’s other important stuff out there … actually, a lot of other stuff: theology, doctrine, homosexuality, abortion, war, the second coming, prophecy, music, discipleship, appearance, serving, worship, tattoos, dancing, drinking, traditions, smoking, language, baptism, moral issues and … well, like we said, lots of stuff. All that stuff is important, and certainly people should try to figure out what to believe about all those things, but that’s exactly the point. We believe that if the “biggies” are sorted out, then all the other stuff will eventually fall into place too. It might not fall into the same place as the brother or sister next to you, but that’s what makes the kingdom of God so interesting. Right?"
Good times.
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