Showdown: Billy vs. Vince

I meant to give a quick update on my shoulder yesterday. I went to the Bone & Joint Clinic Monday. Luckily they did not have to amputate my shoulder. Apparently I have bursitis. (Which I thought only 70 year-olds got.) I saw Dr. Jeff Hovater (we went to high school & college together, it was a little weird) and he gave me a cortisone shot. Now I have to do some physical therapy. I start Friday. After the shot the shoulder got much better. I had no pain at all yesterday. It’s hurting a little today, and it is still really weak. It’s noting like Sunday, though. That was a bad day.

Now, on to my real topic. The battle for TV Spokesperson superiority. The contestants: 1) Old Reliable, Billy Mays. 2) The New Kid, Vince Offer (yep, that’s his last name.) Let’s meet our combatants, shall we?

Let’s start with Mr. Mays. Billy burst on the mail-order product scene several years ago with OxiClean. Since then he’s sold everything from floor cleaner, to adhesive putty, to car scratch repair, and everything in between. Now he’s even selling Health Insurance. What a guy. Billy started his career selling the “Washamatik” on the Atlantic City Boardwalk. Then moved on to selling tools and gadgets at various trade shows. Check out his bio along with various products he has hocked: here.

Contestant #2 is Vince Offer (he’s just known as Vince on his spots.) Vince is to this point known for two products: The ShamWow© and the Slap Chop©. Vince, like Billy, worked the trade show circuit. His career is a little more, um, checkered. See for yourself: here.

Now, let’s compare and contrast.

Vince is a bit abrasive and seems pretty unlikable. Billy screams. Vince uses one of those cool Brittany Spears style countryman mics. Billy dyes his beard. Vince says things like, “You know the Germans always make good stuff,” and, “You’re going to love my nuts.” Billy says almost the same thing regardless of the product he’s endorsing. Vince wants you to have an exciting life by using the Slap Chop. Billy’s name has become a brand itself. Vince used to be a Scientologist. Billy screams. A lot.

As you can see, it’s a neck and neck race. I guess we could make it an informal, completely unscientific poll. Who do you prefer? And why? Let’s have those comments.